Getting there, from here …

Life is dynamic – no matter how much you learn, how hard you work, the investment of time that you invest ~ things change. I am okay with this, in fact – I embrace change for the most part. What I’ve come to realize, however, is that there is one part of the ‘change’ process that can evoke resistance within me; and that is change I must face that I did not ask for or initiate on my own.

There really shouldn’t be a difference in approach when you think about it. Change is change and I should meet it as I’d meet it if it was change I’d consciously chosen to pursue. Regardless of the HOW of change’s emergence ~ the same approach mechanisms are required: a willingness to see/experience/do things differently, an openness to learning a new or different way, an understanding that what worked ‘before’ does not work ‘now’ and therefore seeking a way that works is advantageous, and an ability to engage in new learning, new information, and/or new methods or techniques until it is no longer ‘change’, but a daily practice.

So I’m thinking that the root of the difference in approach to change I initiate and change that is ‘thrust upon me’ is my degree of willingness to engage in the process. It’s good to unearth personal growth opportunities like this. In this time of ‘pursuing happiness’, ‘finding peace’ and ‘seeking fulfillment’ – learning to embrace all change with passion, enthusiasm and a desire for Mastery, regardless of how that change emerged, influences the process immensely.

I’m a big proponent of Mastery. I enjoy learning new things, expanding my horizons and practicing what needs to be practiced, with dedication and commitment, until varying levels of accomplishment are achieved. So it makes sense that a good next step for me would be to enthusiastically support this process no matter how much time it will take, how steep the learning curve may be, how my routine will be re-worked as a result and what will have to be released to accommodate it.

Most immediately – I’m learning to operate within a family dynamic of 3 now that my oldest daughter has gone to University, living there for the duration of the school year. (All 3 of us are learning this as we go – as my daughter will be learning how to operate independently with her family support at a distance.)

I’m learning about more conscious eating and trying new foods that will better support the changes my body is going through as it ages.

I’m learning to better balance what must be done in a day and what I’d appreciate and enjoy doing in a day.

And I remain committed to personal growth, Self development and enlightened living; for my benefit as well as those whose paths I cross at any given time.

So, how does one get there from here?

One mindful moment at a time.

One mindful action at a time.

One conscious choice at a time.

I am now here – and as long as ‘there’ is in sight and willingness is present~ getting there is inevitable.

4 Comments

  1. Mike Korner

    You’re right, Miss Sally … having change thrust upon us is hard. Especially when the change is non-negotiable.

    I’ve come to understand (but still fight it sometimes) that with a non-negotiable change, the fastest way back to the happiness highway is to accept the reality of your new situation and focus on making the best of it.

    For example, if you fall out of a canoe, the best thing to do is quickly accept your new reality and make the best of it by using your swimming talents.

    Most changes aren’t the life-or-death variety, but the “fell overboard” analogy is still a good model for dealing with mandatory changes.

    A while ago, I heard the results of a fascinating study comparing lottery winners and amputees one year after their “change”. The study found the average lottery winner is less happy after a year, and the average amputee is as happy or happier!

    That seems insane on the surface. But it makes more sense when you stop and think about it.

    Winning the lottery (I can only imagine) changes your life quickly and dramatically. Amidst the turmoil, you have to rapidly assess what’s important in your life, make changes (if any) you desire because of the money, and live with your new reality. Meanwhile your long lost relatives bombard you with ideas for spending your money.

    When bad things happen (severe injury, death of a loved one, job loss, etc.) you may have to go into survival mode for a bit while you absorb the change and figure out how to move on. You may even need professional counseling or rehab time … but then you move on.

    Whether the change was good or bad, the way you deal with it can make it into a positive turning point in your life. I guess that’s the ultimate good news.

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    Reply:

    Approach, attitude and willingness are certainly critical aspects to navigating any change, you’re right. That’s not surprising news about the lottery winners – for many, it seems to be the worst thing that could ever happen to them. Mind you, I wonder if it would be different if you were somehow able to pause until you had all your wits about you before launching into ‘spend’ and ‘life changes’ and ‘giving’?

    Either way, you make a great point – the way we deal with change will determine how we ultimate manifest it into our lives. Thank you for commenting here …

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  2. Beth

    Change is so tough sometimes when some of that change is controlled by others. Today, for instance, I’m dealing with a new school option for my son and I find my stress level through the roof because questions I am asking people are getting me into a loop of more looking. Trying to remain calm sometimes is a real challenge when you feel time pressed to begin with! Although I always thought I was a person that dealt well with change, I’m starting to wonder if I really am….
    Glad to see you back online…

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    Reply:

    Hi Beth! I feel dealing with School Boards in general to be a Herculean exercise in Patience. I, too, am trying to work something with the school administration for one of my daughters, and I’m still at the ‘please reply to my requests for communication’ stage. I’ll temper my feelings about Change with this caveat – it’s much more easy to handle once the initial implementation steps are out of the way …

    [Reply]

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